Think "Benedic" from Shakespeare's "Much ado about nothing"

During a conversation online last night, a friend of mine pointed out that I haven't been updating very often lately. I didn't really answer.

This blog has been "Declare that Ditty" over and over with little else for the past month or so. I want to write about what's happening with my life and what's going on in my head, but there's this little problem I keep slamming into at rather high speeds:

Mushy, gushy, mind-clogging love.

Whenever I try to say something about my life, whenever I try to express it these thoughts of dating and romancing and all that stuff just take up all the space in my thought processes. I can't think about politics, about business, about life.

I just think about this girl that I love. I'm not in love with her now, I've never been in love with anyone, ever. I have no idea what it's like to be at that level with someone, just this whole constant-longing stuff that will not go away. It's like an ugly puppy that followed me home one night and hangs out on my porch to beg for scraps, and naturally I keep feeding it because it's really, really annoying when it whines.

Some of you are saying "Ah, how sweet, it's love" at this point, some of you are thinking "ooooh, we're gonna see love poems and romantic portraits," some of you are powering up the voyeuristic parts of your mind and preparing to get some sweet, delicious stuff out of me.

Stop. Stop right now.

This is not about trying to fall in love with a girl. This is about getting out of love for her.

There are all these films out there, always a sappy romantic comedy, that try to talk about the loser-guys of the world getting the brilliant, beautiful girl of their dreams just by having a great personality and saying all the right things. The most recent example was "Hitch."

This is not that sort of thing. This is someone who decided he did not want a relationship, but whose heart is pretending not to have gotten the memo.

So, please forgive me for not posting all that much, my writing process has a giant monkey wrench jammed in the gears. Once I've gotten that taken care of, things should pick up.

If I can get it taken care of.